I don't have pictures today, I promise the husband will provide me with lots of goods ones soon. He is in Chile right now working and took my camera...but will upload pics as soon as possible and send them to me :)
The post is short and pretty much a question to anyone who can read this. You probably noticed or heard how much I have changed in the last 1 1/2 years. Not only due to moving to Brazil, losing a baby, getting pregnant again but also LOTS of financial problems too.
Today I had to get another pair of glasses made for me. In our household they are almost disposable. ( I buy them CHEAP) They are stepped on, bent, have to endure sweat and all sorts of weather and hormonal changes. So I went to the store and ended up getting out of there with one pair to be fixed (I stepped on it and the lenses and side screw were broken) and a new sturdy pair. I am SICK TO MY STOMACH. Even though I got a decent deal and I bargained with the store owner it still makes me SICK to my stomach to spend any money. Even if it's ice cream money. Seriously???do I have a problem?
I used to be a care free student who spent all her money on clothes and things for myself, and nowadays I can't buy myself glasses and not feel guilty. I don't allow myself to splurge or buy anything new. It's either make it work with what I have or go without. What the HECK happened to me? If there is anything new, it's due to my mom feeling sorry for me and buying a pair of shoes (that I immediately put to good use and it's destroyed in about a year) or my grandma makes me pregnancy clothes.
Do any of you go through that? I think I'm gonna have an ulcer just thinking about what I paid. It was just over 100 dollars, but still. I HATE SPENDING MONEY!!!! Today was one of those days where you pay all the bills, and I hate those too, because I see my scarce and beautiful money slip through my fingers and there's nothing I can do about it :( (even though I am grateful those bills get paid and we have water and electricity for another month!!!)
I have mixed feelings about my new self.
Anyone else has gone through that?
I appreciate any thoughts...
Barb
6 comments:
acho q mais murrinha do q eu nao existe...hahaha Eu sou muito murrinha com coisas pra mim. Eu na verdade to aprendendo a deixar a amo mais solta ultimamente. Tem horas q ate compro bastante, mas nao pra mim, mas pras meninas ou brandon.
Eu acho super normal ter essas variacoes Babi, ate porqeu talvez agora vc ta dando "mais valor". E eu acho muito bom q eh assim do q gastar demais, entao fica tranquila!
beijao
Don't feel bad, Babi! I'm sure many men (including my husband, perhaps!) wish their wives were more thrifty. I think although you watch your expenses, it's not like you completely abandon yourself, you know? You still dress nice and do your hair and makeup occasionally. As long as you're not wearing clothes that are totally faded and have visible holes, I think you are fine!! ;)
I think sometimes we get sucked into this awful materialistic mentality, and all we want is bigger, faster, better, newer, and more, more, more! Maybe someday I will afford the newest and best of everything, but at this point mine and Gustavo's lives, it's more important that we let gratitude turn what we have into enough (like that quote that I've seen on Pinterest a few times).
I feel the same way about bills too... You saw my rant about my electric bill!!! But I too, am grateful that we can still pay these bills, and that we do have A/C in our apt!
Vixe col, essa é difícil. Eu tb fiquei bem mais assim com os anos, ainda mais depois com os filhos. Mas agora que eu tô grávida e não tenho quase nenhuma roupa que me serve mais (e não quero ficar comprando roupa de grávida que só vou usar mais 3 meses e depois só daqui alguns anos), o Chris (acredita nisso??) esses dias me disse que eu tinha que comprar uma coisa pra mim de aniversário e não pras crianças. Eu tinha um gift card da Banana Republic que ganhei de dia das mães e só esses dias que usei e acredita com oq? Roupas pro Chris! E eu fiquei BEM mais feliz de ter gasto com roupas pra ele doq pra mim. E é assim com as crianças tb. Por isso que o Chris falou pra eu ir e comprar umas coisinhas pra mim e não comprar nada com o meu dinheiro de aniversário pras crianças (eu QUASE que consegui). Anyway, eu me sinto bem melhor agora com um new pair of jeans (that actually fit!!!) e umas blusinhas novas. Nada fancy, só blusinha de colocar por baixo mesmo, mas já fez a maior diferença. Eu acho que isso me ajudou mto com a minha auto-estima, que ultimamente está mto pra baixo, eu sinceramente não gosto de mim mesma qdo estou grávida, só qdo é uma barriguinha, mas aí qdo chega o barrigão e qdo engordo horrores aí já era, eu odeio e não vejo a hora de ter o bebê pra emagrecer tudo de novo. Nossa, nada a ver oq eu tô falando agora né, desviei totalmente do assunto...Mas oq eu quero dizer é que as vezes não é tão mal a gente comprar uma coisinha aqui e alí e nos sentimos lindas e maravilhosas. Eu não estou falando pra gastar horrores, mas as vezes até um esmalte novo can do the job, sabe? Esses dias eu tava indo pagar minhas compras no Walmart e eu olhei pra direita e vi as bijuterias e tipo, eu NUNCA comprei bijou lá no walmart, tipo, eu sempre penso que é cheap looking e feio, sabe? Mas eu olhei e vi umas coisinhas bonitinhas e resolvi olhar. Acabei achando um brinco que não era nem $4 e adorei. E col, acho que nunca ganhei tantos elogios por causa de um brinco, e qdo eu falo que é do walmart ng acredita hahaha.
Anyway...Esse é meu shpill, espero que tenha ajudado in any way...Eu sei que no Brasil é quase impossível fazer esse tipo de coisa pq td é absurdamente caro mas como eu disse, as vezes um esmalte ou um batom novo can do the job!
Beijo beijo
Menina tem vezes que eu me sinto assim, acho que e completamente normal mas a gente tem que entender que no seu caso os oculos sao necessidade pra voce. No Brasil principalmente, o que voce pagou foi DE GRACA!!! Nao se sinta culpada nao, voce trabalha tanto pra manter o seu lar, e merece um par de oculos novos. Te amo :)
Babi! Sempre lembro dos meus pais falarem de epocas em que as coisas estavam bem apertadas, e de quantas memorias boas eles tiveram tentando improvisar e ser criativos. Obrigada por compartilhar os seus sentimentos. Acho que eu e o Jack as vezes take things for granted especialmente quando eu penso quao dificil as coisas sao no Brasil. No momento estamos com as coisas bem apertadas, e noto quao mais gratos devemos ser. Em riqueza ou em pobreza. Sempre tem bancaos!
Eu sei que voce eh uma super mom. E eu sei que eh uma coisa de mae ser tao selfless assim. E assim como as meninas disseram quando eh uma necessidade e nao uma vaidade voce nao deveria se sentir mal.
Vi no seu blog que a bebezinha ja esta do tamanho de uma beringela. :) Mais uma bonequinha Pretel.
Babi, we all go through certain stages in our life and changes are inevitable. I too remember the days when I would spend a lot of money before I was married.
I had an official (not counting babysitting)job when I was 14 and I loved spending my money however I wanted and never had to ask my parents for money. During my early twenties I had an awesome job and I would go to the mall every weekend with my sisters. I would buy lots of clothes for me and for others, I'd go to the movies 2-3 times a week and I loved to treat my friends and family to dinner at restaurants.
Then I got married and my whole perspective changed. I became more reserved in my spending and really focused on the needs vs wants. My husband was never a shopper (unless he's at Home Depot, hehehe) and I changed my habits. We love not owing money to anyone and I think our habits have helped us because we don't spend money on things we don't really need and instead save money for stuff that will meet our family's needs.
Anyway, when I quit my job and became a full time mom I paid even more attention to the way I spend money. Many, many times I feel like it's not my money to spend (just because I'm not working...and I was so used to working before) and really avoid spending money on stuff for me unless it's something I need. I feel so cheap a lot of times, specially when I am around my sisters (who still go shopping on weekends, hehehe). They also go on lots of trips and always tell me I should do the same. My priorities are different and saving money for a fence for example, is higher on my list than traveling somewhere.
Anyway, it's normal to feel like that, You are just trying to saveguard your money because you want to use it for other things your family might need. Specially when we become mothers we want to forget our needs to meet the needs of our children.
I think you are an awesome mother and wife and you will be rewarded for the many sacrifices you make. Your life may not be the same as it was, but you are accomodating what life throws at you and that only makes you stronger. I'm sure not long from now, things will keep changing for the better and you will see the blessings come as a reward for your faith.
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