The 5th largest city is the world: welcome to Sao Paulo

So I promised a post with tons of pictures, but I'm having a hard time finding my camera cable (am I translating things to portugueses already?I'm not sure cable is the right word)...I think the dang thing is in the ship on the way to this "wonderful" country. Do you feel a little sarcasm already?hahhaahha. Well needless to say I've been less than impressed with Brazil since I've been back. Not only the social differences are horrendous(sp?) I've been really anxious about life in general. I've had to use the SUS to take the girls to doctor's appointment and THANK GOD this country has a "socialist" health care for those that cannot afford a private insurance. The girls have had great treatment so far though and Bia has come down with a nasty ear infection and she is taking a round of antibiotics. Izzy is also sick but we are using the nebulizer and she is not coughing half as much as she was when we first got here.

It's humid!!!!!!My skin is great, but I cannot feel clean during the day. I keep sweating and I have to say I'm pretty sure hell will be humid and heaven will have the perfect climate like Brasilia, hehehehehehehe

So there are two things I have found out about my life that I hadn't previously realized, two things you gotta understand about me: 1) All my life I've been spoiled rotten for being a good girls in my family and I have never been really extremely exposed to poverty and unfortunetly poverty bothers me 2) I'm a little on the naive side for when it comes to real life experiences and I plan on staying that way and raising my children that way. Let me explain myself because I just sounded like a huge jerk. I am really shocked with how things worked in Sao Paulo. I was raised in the capital (Brasilia) in a clean and organized city and now I've introduced to PURE mess. Sao Paulo is caos. I have to say I'm learning how to like it, but it's definitely a process. The pollution and noise drive me nuts, but there's everything you can possibly imagine at your fingertips. The variety is amazing. People are SOOOOOO nice and I have to say I thought people in Rexburg were nice, but I think it's even better in Sao Paulo :) There are soooo many people, it's crazy....we took the subway two days after we got here and went downtown. I don't think I've ever seen so many people together. It was amusing to say the least....we got talking in the subway and met two really nice ladies who were in love with the girls and then we went our ways....people in Sao Paulo are just cool you know? I just love the people....I love brazilian people...their hearts, their smiles...their everything :)

Now the poverty, it bothers me. Because I'm not used to seeing so many poor places. You have to remember I lived in Rexburg for almost 7 years. Clean, neat, organized, small, beautiful.....I come to the polar opposite: dirty, disorganized, crowded and sometimes pretty plain ugly. I catch myself in aw just wondering WHAT IN THE HECK AM I DOING HERE?????

My ear fellow blog friends...I am yet to find out what my purpose is....but I'm sure there's one. Well, I have to hold on to that, because if I don't I will go crazy. Mt has gone to three interviews so far and we haven't heard anything. Next week there's more. People tell us we need to be patient and that opportunity is there. We are doing a lot of networking and the Lord will bless us. It just bugs me that in the meantime we have to live off my parents. I guess I really never learned to be "getter" I like giving a whole lot better than receiving things.

In Brazil everything is smaller: the toothpaste, cars, cups, portions, people, streets, the bread, apartments...EVERYTHING...it's funny and frustating, hehehehehe. I'm still getting used to all of that too :)

We are living in a tiny (and when I mean tiny, I mean a 3 bedroom apartment which is where my parents live with 8 of us). I have taken pics of our sleeping arrangements and it's pretty funny actually. We have managed to establish a routine and we are officially "settled" as far as figuring out how and when to do things.

Food: the fruits and vegetables are amazing....soooooo much better than in the States.... I guess we have to win in at least one aspect right?hahahahaha

Friends: Another thing you have to know about me is the older I get the harder it is for me to change and make more friends. I just love my friends so much and I was so comfortable with them that it just takes effort to want to get to know more people. I'm pretty open, but I have changed so much thru the years that now it takes will power to go out make friends and then be open to them. I need to change for the better!!!! I haven't felt a great need to socialize and I think it's partly because I'm still battling with myself about being here and what I need to do, and how to establish a better routine, how to take advantage of the resources I've been given etc...I need to get out of my shell though and I don't know why it's so hard. (Thank goodness Aline is here otherwise I'd be in deep depression by now, hahahahaha) I think Heavenly Father has a funny sense of humor, every time he knows I'm comfortable I move and then I have to change my life and make friends and fall in love with people and cultures and places and then he moves me again :) (is that why I'm still resistant to change?hahahaha)

Well, this post was just an update. I think I can transfer my pics to my mom's pc tomorrow. So you can have a better idea of how our lives are here. I will just leave you today with information and a lot of complaining :) hahahahahahaha. I'm really sorry I don't have pics yet. I will have them pretty soon :)

Thanks for worrying and praying for us. We are happy close to family and enjoying their company. I mean truly happy and blessed. Even with all my complaining, we are healthy and Heavenly Father has never left our side. I'm just getting used to the ride but I recognize that we have all we need for now and we just have to trust that whatever is the best will end up happening in the end!!!!!!!

Cheers everyone

Barb

Last night in Rexburg....

We have had a crazy busy and fun last few days....I think the way Mat described in his testimony today at church really tells it all "I cannot think of a different word but grattitude". That's how I feel right now. We have had an outpouring of help and friendship throughout the days....People calling offering to take the kids, meals at all times (yummy by the way). We have eaten at our friend's houses for a long time now....We have a lot of people coming over to our home to help us clean up and patch holes on the walls, scrub the floors,ovens, cabinets etc....I've had help packing our luggage and anything else you can probably think of. I truly am GRATEFUL.

I cannot help but think how much of a better friend I could have been, how much more I could have done for others and how much I have learned. I truly LOVE this city and it has become my home for the past 7 years. It's hard to leave it all here and go to the unknown. I really am to the point where I am just AFRAID of leaving Rexburg. I don't think I would mind just staying....I know we have lots to learn wherever we end up, but it will be hard.

We've had friends through "good bye parties" for the past 2 weeks and it has been amazing. They sang for us, they were just THERE so I want to take the time to thank them here because I know that it doesn't take very much from me to thank people, but it means the world to them:

1)Anna: first and foremost I think I have to thank you. For holding on to our friendship thru the good the bad and the ugly :) For being so helpful and so wonderful even when you are expecting twins with wild Thomas running around. Thank you for being part of my success as you helped me graduate,be a better mom and a better friend. I really wish I could have done more for you and been there more for you, but I hope you know that I have learned to be a better person because of you. I want you to know how much I truly love you from the bottom of my heart, and how much I blindly trust you :) Please come live close to me soon? I've become spoiled :) You are family to me, the look alike sister I've never had and always wanted to have :) Remember you can always count on me and that I will always always be there for you. No matter what.

2) Helga: You are just amazing.I can never keep up with your energy and willingness to help and come over for a good laugh. I just love you to pieces. Thank you for your friendship and endless help with the girls and for just listening to me :) CONGRATS on your graduation as this marks a great accomplishment and a huge victory...and know that you are loved wherever you are!!

3)Jana e Samuelson: I really love and admire you. You have been an angel to us and I know that you need to be praised every day for the person you are and whatch you have taught me. I know you will do great things in the future and help Sam to be even a better man than he already is, because you are just that kind of person, You make others better because of your presence and example.

Johan: BIXOOOOOOO. I don't know what to say except that,hehehehehehehe, I think it summs it up. I know Mat will miss you, (and I will miss you too) THANK YOU for all your help, you have been there for us every time we needed and that means a lot to our family. I hope you have felt the same way and that we can always be there for you too....I just love you :) and I hope we live close to each other again...if not, when we all become rich, we can go on cruises together and laugh our heads off from when we were poor and gave each other $5 dollar gift cards from Applebee's (you'll know what I mean pretty soon)

Ana Amelia: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!! You are an amazing women and I love you. I've learned immensely from you and enjoyed every minute we spent together as rommates and friends. I wish you the best wherever you go from here on out and I want you to know that I love and appreciate you :) I will miss you

Paulinha e Cefas: I really hated that we became so close as we were about to leave. I wish you guys had been here all along. I love you and I have found true friends in you. I know our lives will cross paths in the future. Paulinha thanks for all the help that you have given me and all the yummy meals you have served. For laughing so hard together until Mat falls asleep cuz it's so late and he can't handle it anymore :) OBRIGADA OBRIGADA OBRIGADA. You will be forever loved and remembered. We'll see you in a few months ;)

Caroles: Angelita loves you :) I wish I could be here for the a little while longer :) You will be such a great mom....and Bebelle won't hate you in a few years...you will be her cool aunt forever :) Please make some charming boys for my girls after you marry and I will make some charming boys for your girls so we can be family :) I think we actually are family at heart :) I love you and I appreciate all the help and good conversations we've had and memorable times.

Friends: If your name was not specifically mentioned it does NOT mean you are not loved and appreciated. I just felt a great need to show gratitude to those that have had a huge hand in our lives and have helped us so far shape who we areand who we want to become.

I don't have words anymore...I really don't know what to think and feel....I actually feel a little empty and I wish I didn't have to say good-bye. As I think about all the fun and lessons that I have learn I think most of all I have to thank my Heavenly Father. Not only after these years here I recognize my complete dependency on Him and my need to just follow HIS WILL. I actually need to thank Him for sending me the friends and acquaintances in the past years that have taught me so much.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU is really all I can say. We are blessed individuals for all that we have and truly are rich because of our friends.

I now 'bid you farewell' as my next post will be in Brazil....where I will blog more and let you know what is going on in our lives a lot more frequently. I hope the Lord blesses you wherever you are and whatever you do and may God be with you till we meet again :') I can hardly keep my crying under control as I think of this song...

With much love,

Barbara