I don't have pictures today, I promise the husband will provide me with lots of goods ones soon. He is in Chile right now working and took my camera...but will upload pics as soon as possible and send them to me :)
The post is short and pretty much a question to anyone who can read this. You probably noticed or heard how much I have changed in the last 1 1/2 years. Not only due to moving to Brazil, losing a baby, getting pregnant again but also LOTS of financial problems too.
Today I had to get another pair of glasses made for me. In our household they are almost disposable. ( I buy them CHEAP) They are stepped on, bent, have to endure sweat and all sorts of weather and hormonal changes. So I went to the store and ended up getting out of there with one pair to be fixed (I stepped on it and the lenses and side screw were broken) and a new sturdy pair. I am SICK TO MY STOMACH. Even though I got a decent deal and I bargained with the store owner it still makes me SICK to my stomach to spend any money. Even if it's ice cream money. Seriously???do I have a problem?
I used to be a care free student who spent all her money on clothes and things for myself, and nowadays I can't buy myself glasses and not feel guilty. I don't allow myself to splurge or buy anything new. It's either make it work with what I have or go without. What the HECK happened to me? If there is anything new, it's due to my mom feeling sorry for me and buying a pair of shoes (that I immediately put to good use and it's destroyed in about a year) or my grandma makes me pregnancy clothes.
Do any of you go through that? I think I'm gonna have an ulcer just thinking about what I paid. It was just over 100 dollars, but still. I HATE SPENDING MONEY!!!! Today was one of those days where you pay all the bills, and I hate those too, because I see my scarce and beautiful money slip through my fingers and there's nothing I can do about it :( (even though I am grateful those bills get paid and we have water and electricity for another month!!!)
I have mixed feelings about my new self.
Anyone else has gone through that?
I appreciate any thoughts...